Thursday, October 4, 2012

you are the most important person in the world... and you are not.

arty is inheriting a massive amount of privilege by being born male, white, wealthy, and able bodied. he didn't ask for this, and i never want him to feel guilty about being born lucky, but by the same token i want him to be aware of this privilege, the power it gives him, and the fact that this power is not something that it is ever ok to abuse or take for granted.


it's incredibly important to us that he has confidence in himself, that his self esteem is strong, and that he likes himself. this is his best insurance of happiness and success in life, and the best defence he has against mental illness,  and unhealthy relationships.

i want him to know that he is the most important person in the universe to us. that as far as we are concerned, there is nobody more wonderful, precious, or beloved on the face of this blue earth.
but i also want him to know that as a person his is no more important or valuable than any other human being. his rights are no more or less worthy of defence, his needs are no more or less worthy of being met.

i really hope that sj and i can parent him in a way that gives him a sense of both of these things, and the fact that they don't have to conflict. i'm not sure exactly how we'll do it, but i'm pretty sure it will involve reading, travelling, and talking together, being observant, mindful, and critical of our actions and our worlds, and loving each other and the people around us as honestly and and as hard as we can.

6 comments:

  1. Great post! Get though the terrible 2's before you get too deep though lol

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is a great post -- I really appreciate your outlook (for Arty too!). Thanks for sharing these thoughts!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Beautiful. There should be more parents like you guys, and Arty is so lucky to have you.

    ReplyDelete
  4. And...God Bless you too.
    I have noticed this to be a thing. A quiet cause of deep gratitude and appreciation.
    Scriptures speak of Blessings give us, and so through us we can be a blessing, and this helps Goodness go round and round.
    I am very grateful for you three, and appreciate you enormously!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ooh, this is a great post. We too hope to raise Lior in a similar way. So important to feel the love, but also know one's place in the world!

    ReplyDelete